20 signs that you have “mum” status


As if the buggy wasn’t evidence enough…

According to a recent survey, dark bags under the eyes and relishing the weekly food shop are evidence of “mum status”.

Great. Thanks for that.

Other common mummy traits include going out shopping for the day and only returning with stuff for the children, panicking about a late night (I’m doing that now) and crying at everything to do with the children.

Researchers polled 2,000 British mothers and collated a top 20 list of the recognisable clues that point to someone being ‘mum’.

Nine o’ clock bedtimes and celebrating your child’s achievements on Facebook are also mum indicators, along with buying bigger pants, forgetting about being fashionable and feeling like all work colleagues are younger than you.

Depressingly true. Although I disagree with nos. 17 – I have never learnt to get up early on a hangover – and 19 – I definitely don’t find my child’s “toilet” habits hilarious in the slightest.

Here are the survey results:


1. You’re always in a rush – 53 per cent

2. You constantly look tired – 52 per cent

3. You spend your entire time thinking about food and what to cook – 44 per cent

4. You go out shopping for the day and only return with stuff for the children – 43 per cent

5. Always leaving the house with three bags instead of one – 38 per cent

6. You have permanent bags under your eyes – 37 per cent

7. You cry at everything related to children – 34 per cent

8. Start going to bed at 9pm every night – 32 per cent

9. You look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards – 31 per cent

10. You no longer celebrate your own achievements on Facebook, only those of your child – 30 per cent

11. Finding bigger pants are more comfortable – 30 per cent

12. You panic about a late night – 29 per cent

13. Forgetting what is in fashion – 28 per cent

14. Other work colleagues seem so young – 28 per cent

15. Getting drunk on one glass of wine – 26 per cent

16. Suddenly a people carrier seems like a good idea – 24 per cent

17. You learn to get up early with a hangover – 22 per cent

18. You get excited by the weekly food shop – 21 per cent

19. Finding conversations about toilet habits hilarious – 17 per cent

20. You rely on programmes such as This Morning and Loose Women for tips on motherhood – 9 per cent

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